"A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality."- John Lennon.
Van read this quote in a booklet of the sayings of famous musicians. It stopped him for a moment, because all he does is dream. He's a dreamer, but all his dreams are dreamt alone. No one else, to his knowledge, shares his dream. His main dream is that he is indeed a person. He is himself. It sounds so foolish- of course he is Ivan. But he doesn't see it that way.
So re-reading the quote, he mutters to himself, "If only others dreamt me as myself. A person, with human dignity. They dream I am a freak, and therefore I am. I dream, therefore I am. If only others dreamt I was a person, then I could become reality. I would be real. I would be me."
He sighs, puts down the book, and cries a little to sleep.